04:26

I actually have a reason to be up at this time of morning! Just handed in an assignment for university which is due Thursday. I started the assignment Tuesday afternoon so not too shabby for a few hours work! Of course that should not be my mentality..

Recently I feel like university is really dragging me down emotionally. The idea of spending a 9-4 Monday within university lecture theatres and classrooms is close to depressing. I guess my thinking is that whilst I get a degree at the end of my 4 years of study, it does not ensure me a graduate level job. Just because I worked (fairly) hard to obtain a degree, it does not entitle me anything in the world of work. I considered dropping out of university to find a job or an apprenticeship in something I enjoy, but there are numerous reasons why I couldn’t go through with it.

First reason: I’ve made it to my third year of university and now nearly half way through my second trimester. I have 1 year left of studies which will be my Honours Project in 4th year (yes, Scotland insists on 4 years of study), which hopefully I will enjoy a lot because it will be tailored to my interests. I made it thus far, I didn’t want to essentially waste these 3 years by dropping out.

Second reason: My parents would not be happy. Twenty something or not, my parents still hold rein on my important decisions and they always come into consideration! I can hear it now.. ‘wasting  your life with pointless things’ ‘why didn’t you just complete it?’ and so on…

Third reason: I have no idea what kind of job I would enjoy. No idea. Ever since I was young I never had that drive or urge to be a specific something. I wasn’t the girl who took dance classes in the hope of becoming a ballerina, I wasn’t even the little girl who liked to pretend to be a princess when she grew up. I have always been stuck in a limbo of uncertainty about my future career. Job quizzes and flow charts showed me various routes I could take but none really caught my eye as something I REALLY wanted to do.

Maybe it’s just a bout of laziness as assignment deadlines loom but hopefully I’ll be more willing to go into university next week!

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