‘I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.’
I have often been told, ‘you can do it because you’re you’, meaning people know that I can hold my own, that I can deal with anything thrown at me and I have an inner strength that others may lack. Thus far I have also thought the same thing of myself. I am headstrong, stubborn and self-reliant.
However recent events have made me reconsider my own ways of coping. I realise that I am not invincible nor am I weak, but I cannot do things solely on my own nor do I need a hoard of people to comfort and console me.
I am a Christian and yet though I attend church every week, I find it hard to rely on anyone but myself. This week has been a learning process: learning to trust, learning to rely on God fully and learning to entrust my problems to the Lord. I am slowly getting there. I hope by the end of this church training course I can get back to a place where my mind is content and my heart is no longer burdened with anger and sadness. However if I don’t quite make it to that point, I would like to know that I am making progress in getting there and that God is abiding with me every step of this difficult way.