16:45

Yesterday I had the chance to catch up over dinner and dessert with a friend who I lost contact with 7 years ago. While we have seen each other in passing often over those 7 years, there was an unwritten rule that we didn’t talk to each other any more. Though there was never any verbal or written confirmation that we were no longer friends all those years ago, we both felt things had grown cold and we fell out of touch. Last night’s dinner with mutual friends allowed us to reconnect a little and to catch up on the little things. Sometimes all that’s needed is the acknowledgement that things are okay though a former friendship disappeared. It shows growth and development from both parties. What happened in the past becomes irrelevant and people are able to move on.

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21:50

‘Getting older also helps you develop X-ray vision. The strange thing is that the moment people start looking at you less is when you start being able to see through people more.’

Amy Poehler – Yes Please

23:37

Today I accompanied my granddad and mother to the hospital to hear the results of my granddad’s biopsy. The surgeon called us into a room with two nurses, and spoke to us regarding the results and their decision. Unfortunately their discussion of the results had led to a negative outcome: my granddad has a high possibility of gastric cancer.

My parents had prepared for this notion in advance, and had also told me and my brothers of this possibility. However, hearing it from a surgeon made it all the more real. People often call cancer the big ‘C’. Whether this is to avoid the reality of calling it ‘cancer’ or to lessen the blow, I am not really sure.

What does this mean? My granddad will have keyhole surgery in a few weeks time to confirm the presence of cancerous cells, and to ensure it has not spread elsewhere. After that, if it does prove to be cancer, he will undergo chemotherapy. Following that will be an open surgery to remove part of his stomach.

There was a lot to take in and process today. I think the not knowing is the hardest part. It could be cancer, but it could also be a benign condition. The surgeon told us that they would treat it as cancer and do their utmost to help my granddad through it.

At more than 70 years old, my granddad has faced numerous health problems in the past, and this adds to the ever-growing number. He is brave and has always gotten through his troubles with a smile on his face. Even during the meeting he smiled and kept his spirits up. Sometimes I wonder about the way we age. When we are younger we cannot wait to grow up, to get out of school and explore the world. When it comes to being older we may face many problems and we may yearn for our younger lives which were so carefree. I hope that whatever steps come next will be the best ones for my granddad. I ask my readers to keep him in your prayers.

00:21

Through the last few years of living away from home I have found that returning to my home town is comforting and it feels very safe. Recently I returned to my home for a short break and being back reminded me of the person I used to be.

Having moved out from the house I grew up in I realised the changes I had subtly made in myself to adapt to my new environment. I rarely get homesick, of course I miss my family and friends back at home, but living my own independent life kind of trumps that. I have a new found independence, I have no need to rely on others for food, money or transportation. I have my group of friends in my new place, a network of associates in which we all strive towards the same aim.

Thinking back to my life in this house I know that I was quiet and shy, not outgoing or very interesting, but that seems to have changed. From moving out to another city I was forced to alter my behaviour to face life in the real world. I was forced to grow up.

I am grateful for both the girl that lived in this house and the new changed girl who lives elsewhere, because together they create the well rounded girl who can cope with change.