21:30

These lock down weeks seem to come in quicker and quicker as the months go by. Already tomorrow is Friday and brings around another weekend which is not much different from the rest. This week I have explored a few new areas of Edinburgh by foot (even in the pouring rain), baked scones, had video calls, cleaned and tidied my room, and also watched a stupid amount of Netflix, YouTube and films. The other things such as sleeping at crazy hours and eating weird cravings I don’t really need to mention…

More significant happenings include my younger brother and his wife are expecting a baby in December! Super happy news and I’m thankful that they came to tell me in person (from 6ft away of course). Definitely a blessing to brighten up a dreary lock down time, and something to look forward to when all this is over. I will become an aunty twice this year so have started collecting cute clothing etc for the babies in preparation for meeting them!

An important choice I made this week was to cut out black tea from my consumption. I recently noticed the toll tea took on the colour of my teeth so am actively using natural methods to combat the stains. I still occasionally drink green tea but have been sticking to water in a bid to keep a healthier system. Definitely miss the little caffeine boost from tea but thankfully I don’t need it during lock down!

22:18

It is the first day of 2016!

I pretty much did nothing all day today but last night was a hectic and fun-filled lead up to the annual celebrations. I rang in the new year with my friends in Edinburgh where we watched the fireworks in the cold, before rushing inside to eat and play games. With my new year celebrations lasting till 5am, my 1st January was mostly spent sleeping and recovering. The ‘quiet after the storm’ kind of thing.

I hope you have all had a lovely start to the new year, and may 2016 bring all kinds of blessings! Happy new year!

21:38

After a long weekend back in my home town I am safely back in Edinburgh. So did I get a chance to recharge and to rest up before returning to my work life? In a way; yes, but in many other ways; no.

  1. On Friday evening I took the train intending to have a smooth journey home, and to get an early night in before the wedding festivities. However my train was delayed in Newcastle for over two hours so I missed all my connecting trains… The signal failure was due to deliberate vandalism! I was not happy.
  2. After sitting in the station for an extended period of time I eventually made it to York station on a packed train. As I had missed all my connecting trains I had to rush here and there to find trains which would hopefully get me to my home town that day. Luckily I brought a tiny suitcase which I could run with! I ended up in Leeds late into the evening, and reached Sheffield at past midnight.
  3. As it got later and later I realised I would not be getting home that day. The train carriage was filled with drunken revellers on their way home from a night out, and the noise gave me a headache. Trains from Sheffield to Leicester only ran on the hour and I had missed all of those for that day, thus meaning I would have to wait till morning. So frantically using the last of my battery on my phone, I searched for hotels near Sheffield train station so that I could rest up. I found a cheap-ish hotel which was close by and power walked to it. Being alone in a strange city late at night was very scary, especially because I was tired, frustrated and upset.
  4. As I checked into the hotel I could feel my body relaxing a little. There was nothing else I could do about the situation so the least I could do was get some much needed rest in the hotel. The room was really modern and the king-sized bed was super comfortable! The waterfall shower was very soothing and it felt amazing to wash the evening of travel off. I had been reassured by the train conductor that I could use my tickets the next day and not have to pay for new ones, so I slept soundly till morning.
  5. On Saturday morning I woke up feeling refreshed after such a manic evening, and got ready to travel home. The trains to Leicester were much more frequent than the previous night and were much quicker journeys! Within an hour and 15 minutes I was safely back in Leicester and I got picked up by my brother. I was very much relieved to be back and to have the ordeal over with!

I feel like every time I face a hardship I can learn from it. I also thank God that it was not as bad a situation as it could have been. Although I did get upset at the time, I also was able to find a way out and to make the most of a bad event. The night alone in a hotel gave me some time to reflect on my evening, and to realise that I am stronger than I perceive myself. My independence has made me a more well-prepared person, and I can deal with tough situations. Hopefully I can continue to grow and learn through my struggles and to empower myself more from the lessons I receive.

22:15

Sleep is something I really took for granted in my university days. I often had days off and would sleep past noon and spend lazy days in the house. Now that I have to wake up early every morning to go to work I have learnt to savour the precious hours of sleep.

Every night I wind down in bed by checking my social media and soon I find my eyes closing of their own accord. By 11pm I am normally very ready to sleep; sometimes even before this time. Sleep early and rise early!

Working life has surely taken its toll on my student body but I can feel productivity and alertness spreading too. One day at a time!

02:27

I am feeling thoughtful tonight. Night time is a time for thoughts to swirl, for ideas to develop and for feelings to flourish.

By morning these deep thoughts have disappeared and all is refreshed and new. Night is the period of time for deep emotions to be manifested, for the truth to rise up out of our souls. Night time is more honest than the day, barriers are taken down and masks are removed.

02:59

I’m having one of those nights where I should be sleeping but I don’t want to get into bed yet. Those nights where I sit at my laptop and do anything to avoid falling asleep. I don’t know why I do it. It’s not productive, it’s not healthy, nor is it much fun.. but night after night I find it recurring.

Maybe I’m just looking for an escape from my dreams.

03:26

Early mornings seem to be my most productive. They are the hours where I can conjure up essays and elaborate revision plans, and push through half a season of a drama. Early mornings are also the times when I confess some of my inner most secrets. My thoughts and feelings are set free in the morning, they roam the walls and paint the ceiling and are more openly expressed than in the day time.

I am a self confessed night owl, one who hunts at night and sleeps in the day. Late nights are used for deep chats and sharing. They are for exploring the crevices of my mind, setting free the thoughts that are enchained during the day, for loosening the wonders that are reigned back.

Nights and early mornings make everything seem more true, more real. Words spoken are genuine and true, they are soft yet honest. Though they are whispered, they shout the truth through unmasked words.